| When they say |
They really mean
|
| ALL NEW |
Not compatible with previous versions |
| ADVANCED DESIGN |
Upper management doesn't understand it |
| BREAKTHROUGH |
It nearly booted on the first try |
| NEW! |
It comes in different colors from the previous version |
| DESIGN SIMPLICITY |
It was developed on a shoe-string budget |
| EXCLUSIVE |
We're the only ones who have the documentation |
| FIELD TESTED |
Manufacturing does not have a test system |
| FOOLPROOF OPERATION |
All the parameters are hard coded |
| FUTURISTIC |
It only runs on the next generation supercomputer |
| HIGH ACCURACY |
All the directories compare |
| IT'S HERE AT LAST |
We've released a 26 week project in 48 weeks |
| MAINTENANCE FREE |
It's impossible to fix |
| PROVEN PERFORMANCE |
It worked through beta test |
| MEETS QUALITY STANDARDS |
It compiles without errors |
| REVOLUTIONARY |
The disk drives go round and round |
| SATISFACTION GUARANTEED |
We'll send you another copy if it fails |
| STOCK ITEM |
We shipped it once before and can do it again, probably |
| UNMATCHED |
It's almost as good as the competition |
| UNPRECEDENTED PERFORMANCE |
Nothing ever ran this slow before |
| YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT |
We finally got one to work |
holland@guidancetech.com